My dears,
I know my duality is a lot to handle. I'm the textbook definition of "it's complicated". I'm both a mellow marshmallow and a feral beast.
You might find me listening 'Put your head on my shoulder' by Paul Anka on repeat, and next thing you know I'm daydreaming about wearing a leather choker and having a man hold me on a leash. You might hear me preaching world peace, and next thing you know I'm screaming at a bad driver who didn't use its indicator.
The scorpio in me craves for violence — yet needs delicate handling.
And I came to understand I'm (un)consciously pursuing this. That's why I'm getting detached from him, and attached to whomever showcases the traits I truly need.
Men, it's not that deep — it's not you, it's me. Apologies in advance if I act inappropriate or give you the illusion you are special to me. Truth is, you're likely not. But then maybe you are. I'm just currently in the feral phase, I'm thirsty. Find me again when I'm mellow, I might sing a different song.
A kite pilot — that's what I need. Someone who can steer and navigate high winds, cross winds, hurricane force winds even. Someone who can keep me high when I'm going low.
Waiting for you, whomever you may be,
_