A pivotal moment, to say the least. A change of life. A change of timeline. That's the potential that tomorrow holds. It will redefine everything. It will be make or break.
If make then… You'll be one of the first to know. Not only that. But also…
That I don't believe in coincidences and that I feel like I've just been watching the dominos of my life finally falling into place. The fruits of my efforts and my patience pay off. The sacrifices and doubts, the resilience and persistence, the wait and hopes. The biggest heartbreak. Then your astonishing entrance into my life. The timing of it all. The meaning behind. The untold promises. The healing lurking. Full consciousness and enlightenment. Love.
That everything that didn't make sense now does. That you where exactly where and when I needed you, unknowingly. That I loved you way too fast, but regret nothing. That I'm not delusional to the point I imagine anything will happen between us — but that my heart doesn't listen to my brain. Never has, never will. That I fell for you, that it all feels delicious, that it tastes like honeyed wine. That I don't expect reciprocation nor anything else from you. That you set ablaze something within me, that I thought dead and buried six feet under. Love.
That I'm grateful for you.
If break then… You'll be one of the first to know. But only that. Not that I had wished every single night since then that this could be our trigger. Our trigger to something wild, something grand. Something earth shattering. Not the illusions, the delusions — nor the disillusionment that followed.
Hope I make it.
Both roads will be rocky. But one is sunny and leads me closer towards you. I think it's a good thing, even if a dangerous thing, yet not a sure thing. But the idea of it is enough for me, today.
This letter does not make any sense today, but tomorrow will shed a new light on it.
Tomorrow, Thursday.